“The world had changed a great deal, but the little rules, contracts, and customs had not, which meant the world hadn't actually changed at all.”
History often portrays the people who fought for the rights we have today as a monolith of revolutionaries. The truth, however, is that those were people from vulnerable communities, who were already facing oppression. On paper, there are many rights and protections bestowed upon marginalised people, but what good are these laws when mindsets continue to be regressive and judgemental? Modern-day feminists are held in comparison to their predecessors who fought an entirely different set of prejudices. But just because some of those stereotypes have been erased, does not mean there are no more challenges to face.
Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 was first published in 2016 during a time that South Korea witnessed the rise of the #MeToo movement. The timing of the book’s publication turned it into a touchstone of dialogue on feminism and misogyny not just in Korea, but worldwide. This is an unusual book, a strange combination of fiction and facts. We have previously reviewed Han Kang’s “The Vegetarian”, which begins with the perspective of a man into his wife’s mental illness. This book starts similarly, with a man observing his wife Jiyoung, who is behaving oddly- speaking like she is someone else, speaking rudely to older family members, etc. At first, he speculated that his wife might be suffering postpartum depression, but it is still tough to ascertain what is causing her behaviour.
The rest of this short book follows Kim Jiyoung's life in chronological order, highlighting various instances of misogyny and challenges she faces right from a young age. We see Jiyoung feel uncomfortable emotions that so many women, unfortunately, experience throughout our lives. Some of the themes are extremely common in Asian cultures and families, and as Indian women, we could easily draw parallels from Jiyoung's story to not just our own experiences, but also that of our mothers, grandmothers, all the women in our lives. These prejudices are so deeply ingrained in our society that we have resigned to them as the norm, and this seems to be the case in every part of the world.
Jiyoung’s childhood is marked by the disappointment of being the second girl child of her parents, in a society that idealises having sons. Once her brother is born, Jiyoung and her sister live as second fiddle to their younger sibling, forced to mature and take responsibilities while they are still children. This idolisation of the boy child is common in patriarchal systems, with the reasoning that it is the son who will eventually take care of his aged parents. In ensuring a sheltered life for their son, Jiyoung’s family often sidelines their daughters’ education and motivations, something so many women have experienced. As Jiyoung begins her schooling, she encounters predatory teachers, harassment from boys, and institutional sexism. It also reveals a peculiar double standard rampant in society- where boys are considered irresponsible but will still be chosen as leaders and given accolades, while girls must be diligent and mature, only to be relegated to smaller leadership positions.
Entering college brings forth another set of challenges for her; maybe it is because we are also recent graduates, but this section of Jiyoung’s life is most relatable to us. Jiyoung observes the lack of female role models in any field she picks, the harassment women are subjected to in the name of job interviews, and the farce of work-life balance. It makes us reflect just how often women are forced, consciously or otherwise, to choose either their career or their family life, a choice that never weighs as heavily over men. This is highlighted in Jiyoung’s husband offering to “help out” in domestic chores once their child is born so that Jiyoung can continue working as if he does not have the innate responsibility of caring for his child and home. We won’t go into detail about Jiyoung’s story since this is already a short read, but the book looks into issues such as internalised misogyny, workplace discrimination, agency, and intersectional feminism.
Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 has several unique stylistic choices. Several of the fictional events of Jiyoung’s life highlight particular themes such as gender wage inequality, child sex ratios, women in workplaces, Korea’s hoju family system, etc. Not only are these themes portrayed throughout Jiyoung’s fictional account, but the book also provides actual statistical findings and data. This may not appeal to all readers, but since one of us is an economist, it's great to see some data in the book :)
The writing style is deliberately detached and to avoid spoilers we won’t analyse it further. There are, however, instances within the narrative, where Jiyoung seems to be a bystander in her own life, never reacting or taking a stand against the injustice she faces. While there are many women who cannot stand up for themselves for whatever reason, Jiyoung’s apathy to her own suffering is very frustrating at times. Perhaps this is also the genius of the book; the clinical narration means that none of the problems Jiyoung faces can be dismissed as hysteria or emotional bias. It also allows the author to insert actual data into a fictionalised story, which makes it impossible to deny the deep-rooted problem of sexism.
Many other reviewers have expressed how angry the book makes them, the depictions of sexism so visceral and normalised that it leaves them fuming. Perhaps it is a testament to just how deeply patriarchal our own society is, but we did not feel anger while reading this book. We felt seen, because so many of the injustices women face are dismissed as overreactions. The book highlights everyday sexism and reveals prejudices that most people assume to be of a bygone age. The truth is that these prejudices have become more insidious, disguised by the veneer of education, customs, and societal values. Perhaps the best evidence of everything the book highlights is the response to this book. While it was heralded as an important piece of feminist literature, it was also meted with criticism for inciting “misandry." Actors and K-pop stars who mentioned the book received a great deal of abuse and harassment- all for simply reading a book about feminism.
Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 is a short and quick read but it tells a story shared by most women, only differentiated by borders.
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